Don't do it Di! The alternative to the Royal Wedding

Whatever your views of the monarchy, the royal wedding is a great excuse for a drink and a dance. But visitors should dodge the official celebrations; the most fun will be at the alternative wedding parties.

On 29 April London hosts the wedding of Prince William to the popular Kate Middleton. The government has encouraged celebration along the lines of Groucho Marx, who once said "Let joy be unconfined, let there be dancing in the streets, drinking in the saloons and necking in the parlour."
 

As we reported before, this is a big deal. There will be a procession to the church, the marriage service will be relayed by speakers to the crowds, and there will be big screens in locations across London. But in today’s exciting cultural climate, standing for hours to catch a glimpse of a guardsman is unlikely to be as popular as it once was.

And the country has moved on from 1981 and the wedding of Prince Charles and Diana when it still revered the monarchy. This year, the most fun looks like it will be with the alternative parties and events.

The Not The Royal Wedding Party has already had a scuffle with officials. Their first proposal was rejected by Camden Council, but they’ve found a central venue to go ahead with. They’re planning food, stalls and entertainment. But it won’t be all fun, as they say, “there will also be a very serious message - Britain's 10 million republicans won't be ignored, and we certainly won't be hiding. We're out and proud and determined to succeed!”









If you’re hungry on the day then there’s a one-day-only pop-up royal wedding cake shop. Miss Cakehead will be filling a shop with cakes featuring ‘phototoppers’ of the happy couple and union jack cupcakes, as well as a cake ‘set’ of all the royal family appearing on the Buckingham Palace balcony.

During the evening, you might want to celebrate in a nightclub (Proud Cabaret), where there’s “a celebration of Love and Lust with satire of everything British, royal role reversals and a “patriotic striptease””.

Or down the road, there’s a Right Royal Knees up 80s special (Islington Academy) where you can “Party like its 1981 at the wedding of Charles and Di. Make sure you get togged up in your 80s wedding best as we’ll be crowning the King and Queen of Fromage”

But our favourite event, the night before the big day enjoy back-to-back science fiction and horror film films with a gruesome marital theme. Featuring ‘Bride of the Gorilla’,‘I Married a Monster from Out of Space’ and the Boris Karloff classic ‘Bride of Frankenstein’.

Of course, rather than one of these alternative events you could go to the wedding itself, get crushed between the celebrators and the protestors, not see anything, and pay over the odds for a cheap ice cream. As they said thirty years ago, don’t do it Di.